Domestic violence is anytime a person is hurt—pushed, hit, controlled, threatened, forced, taken advantage of, degraded, insulted, frightened, or abused financially. Sadly, those who are affected by domestic violence don’t often talk about it; whether they are scared, worried, or embarrassed, it’s a conversation that needs to be had. Those who are victims of domestic violence may feel like they are powerless.
If you know someone who is experiencing domestic violence or showing signs of abuse, here are a few helpful tips. But regardless of whether you know someone or not, domestic violence is something no one should experience, and we hope you’ll join us and help spread awareness.
Domestic Violence: Abuse Signs, Awareness, & Helpful Tips
It’s hard to know what happens to those we care about when doors are closed and they don’t tell us, but there can be signs of domestic violence.
Domestic Violence Warning Signs
- Afraid to please their spouse
- Does everything their partner tell them?
- They don’t do things because their partner doesn’t let them
- Mention that their spouse is jealous or possessive.
- Often has visible injuries and blames them on accidents.
- Low self-esteem, depression, or personality changes.
- Misses appointments, work, or social outings for no reason.
- Dress to hide any cuts, bruises or scars they may have. (I am not willing to take off sunglasses.)
- Checks in with their partner before doing anything, or reports to them what they are doing, who they are with, and what they are doing.
- They don’t go out without their partner
- Suddenly, I am not allowed to see certain family or friends
- Doesn’t have access to money
Leaving isn’t always as easy as packing your things and moving on. Abusers are good at making their victims feel helpless, powerless, and controlled. The abusers might make them feel like it’s their fault and they deserve the abuse. I’ve been in an abusive relationship, and it wasn’t easy to leave because I didn’t know what I would do once I left.
The best thing we can do to help those who are victims of domestic violence is speak up, talk about it, and educate them so they know there is a way out and life after they leave. Do you know someone who is a victim of an abusive relationship? In addition, emotional abuse does count, and it is a larger problem than many things. When people think of domestic violence, they often picture physical abuse, and emotional abuse can leave someone battered and bruised from the inside out.
Whether someone is hitting you, calling you names, or controlling your money, it’s abuse, and nobody should have to live like that. An abuser will try to control you, and they often use money to do so. Financial abuse can include:
- Controlling finances
- Keeping credit cards, debit cards, and cash
- Making someone account for every penny
- Keeping necessities
- Preventing one from working, going to school, or trying to better themselves
- Stealing
- Giving an allowance
Raise Awareness Domestic Violence: The All State Foundation Purple Purse Campaign
Domestic violence happens far too often, affecting one in four women in her lifetime. Did you know that more women have breast, lung, and ovarian cancer combined? It’s horrible to think that many people think domestic violence consists of physical abuse, when in fact financial abuse happens in 98% of all cases of domestic violence. Financial abuse is one of the most powerful ways to keep a victim trapped. They often go together, and about 8 in 10 Americans have not heard much about financial abuse as a form of domestic violence.
Did you know the number one reason survivors of domestic violence stay, leave, or go back to an abusive relationship is due to finances and not having the resources to get away?
Domestic violence is a serious problem, something that needs to be talked about, and I’m honored to be part of the Allstate Foundation Purple Purse campaign, which aims to make domestic violence a fashionable subject to talk about. You can help too by joining the Purple Purse Challenge and opening not just your wallet but also your heart to stand up for these survivors and the wonderful organizations that serve them by visiting PurplePurse.com.
I have to applaud the All State Foundation because they are investing more than half a million dollars in the Purple Purse Challenge. The purple purse is more than stylish; it is helping to make lives safer. It is being used by nonprofits that are participating in the Allstate Foundation Purple Purse Challenge to help get everything talking, or at least spark a conversation about domestic violence, as well as financial empowerment in their communities.
When you donate at least $10, you’ll be entered for a chance to win the purple purse designed by the lovely Kerry Washington. There will be three winners every single day, but to check out all the details and help raise awareness, be sure to visit PurplePurse.com. The Center on Violence Against Women and Children at Rutgers University School of Social Work has new evidence that boosting survivors financial literacy resources as well as their skills can help create a new path toward longer-term safety and security for survivors.
If you or someone you know needs help, they can contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline by calling 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or TTY 1-800-787-3224.